3.31.2008

Integrity

Over the last couple of weeks, I've been thinking a lot about integrity. Specifically, I've been thinking about how the lack of personal integrity can have such a damaging effect on community.

Back in the early 1990's when I was just starting out in ministry, a good friend and long-time pastor gave me some advice that has helped to guide me throughout the years more than any other I've gotten. He said, "In the end, it won't matter if you were a great preacher, or a super administrator, or an excellent teacher, or an amazing leader. What will matter is if you were faithful, and if you had integrity." Now I readily admit that I often selfishly want to be a great preacher (or at least thought of as one), and that I often selfishly want to be a super administrator (or at least seen as one), and that I often selfishly want to be an excellent teacher (or at least respected as one), and that I often selfishly want to be an amazing leader (or at least considered to be one). But that advice from a trusted mentor rings in my head whenever that selfishness gets the better of me..."faithfulness and integrity".

Although there are often 3 main definitions given for the word integrity (from "strict adherence to a moral or ethical code", to "the state of being unimpaired", to "completeness"), to me personally, integrity simply means being genuine. If I proclaim with my mouth, then my actions need to proclaim the same message. What I preach from the pulpit needs to be lived out in my daily walk. There can be no seperation between what I say I'm about, and what I really am about. I need to be genuine. To me that's integrity. Am I pefect at that? Do I always get it right? Of course not. But is it a priority for me? Absolutely.

Over these last couple of weeks, a community that I am a part of has suffered greatly from what I believe to be a lack of integrity in one of its members. It has been a reminder to me of just how important integrity is, and just how damaging the lack of it can be to others, especially when we covenant together to be in community; when we commit to "life together". Although the damage is deep and painful, it has been a good reminder to me to look into the mirror and take stock of my life. Am I being faithful? Am I being genuine? Is there integrity?

3.18.2008

Jerusalem

It is during Holy Week that I most often find myself longing for Jerusalem. Twice in my life I have been privileged to walk the narrow streets of that ancient walled-city so important in the scriptures. And both times (each 3-5 days in length) I had an overwhelming sense that I was in some way "home". It is difficult to describe such a feeling in detail, but from the first moment I entered through the Jaffa Gate, I felt a familiarity that often I only feel when I am at home.

Some of the most powerful and profound moments of my faith occured there within the Old City walls, or just outside them in places like the Garden of Gethsemene on the Mount of Olives. It was almost as if my faith became real in a tangible way as I wandered the pathways and felt the great slabs of stone beneath my feet. These were the paths of Jesus. The stories I had read and heard came alive. And through those pilgrimage experiences, they still do.

In two short days we will experience Maundy Thursday. As I hear the texts of that evening in the midst of a Service of Tenebrae, I know already that my mind will transport me back to a place that I long to see again. A place that I wish all could see and experience. I often pray for the peace of Jerusalem, as the scriptures command. And in my heart this week, I pray with expectation that great Jewish prayer and farewell greeting..."Next Year in Jerusalem!"

3.07.2008

The Cup

It would be extremely easy to say that our cup is half-full at best right now. Our congregation has experienced a deeply painful month. 3 discoveries of cancer (possibly 4). 5 deaths. 1 horrific accident resulting in two badly broken legs. 1 discovery of a brain tumor. 1 discovery of a brain cyst. Job losses. Divorce. Legal issues. Substance abuse. All within the last month for our congregation of 300 or so. And of course, this is simply the tip of the iceberg, as many more trials and concerns are faced by many in silence or in semi-private. We find ourselves wanting to ask "Why?", and wondering if we'll ever be able to see the glass as half-full again.

And yet I am not sure if I have ever seen so vividly the church being the church before. At every turn, and at every trauma, people are stepping forward to help and pray for those who are in need. The understanding that we, as a body of believers, are to "be there" for each other in times of good and bad is no longer just a matter of words. It is a daily way of life for us as we care for each other during these times of crisis. And as pastor of this amazing congregation, it is overwhelming to see the faithfulness of God's people, as they carry forth the call to "love one another".

By no means does that supercede the pain and grief faced by so many within our body. But it does help to alleviate the need to focus on the "why?", and instead focus on how God is being glorified in the midst of this world's pain. For the church is called to reflect the very essence of God in Jesus Christ, which is in many ways simply, the promise of His eternal presence. For He is "Emmanuel"; "God with us". We are no longer alone, no matter what we encounter or go through. He is with us. Be it pain or joy, our God is with us.

It has taken me this long to figure it out, but I have figured it out. It matters not whether the cup is half full or half emtpy. What matters is that in the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, we are given the cup freely, and it is kept filled for us, and it shall never run dry, no matter how often we drink from it.